One Man Scandal
Shawn Winters

Adjust Your TV's Accordingly

Sunday July 12th, 2009

* The scene opens up at Shawn Winters Los Angeles mansion where Shawn is reclined outside by his pool in a seemed drug/alcohol induced coma is quickly awaken by an overly excited Miranda who leaps on top of him straddling him. Shawn is quickly distraught not quite knowing where he is or what is happening. He squints his eyes and shields them from the sun light with his palm as he tries to regain focus. *

Miranda – Babe, have you been laying out here all day? You’re going to be sun burnt as hell!

Shawn – Wha-no, I’m covered don’t worry about it. Wha-where have you been all day? It’s like 8 at night.

Miranda – Shawn…it’s 3 in the afternoon.

Shawn – Correcting my drunken memory isn’t answering my question woman, where have you been all day?

Miranda – I’ve been helping Ryan move in, remember…this was his weekend to move in to his apartment?

Shawn – Ryan…

* Shawn’s mind races trying to figure out who this Ryan person is only to have it hit him quickly. *

Flashback – Prom Night (May 22nd)

Miranda – Shawn this is Ryan, Ryan this is Shawn.

Ryan – The great Shawn Winters, wow…dude you’re a lucky man to have this girl to sleep next to every night.

Miranda – Aw Ryan!

* Miranda playfully pushes him. *

Miranda – Shawn this is my ex-boyfriend. We went to prom together last year. Now this year he’s a favorite to win prom king.

Shawn – Oh, so you’re still in high school then?

Ryan – Yes, but next year I’ll be joining Miranda at USC. Maybe you and I could get an apartment together or something.

Miranda – Yeah, that could be fun.

Shawn – Whoa…

Ryan – Ya know I still have those pictures that you sent me right before prom.

* Miranda starts to blush. *

Miranda – No! You saved those?!

Ryan – Of course I saved them! They were so sexy! It defiantly got me excited to be taking you to prom haha.

Shawn – No! Give me your phone!

* Shawn reaches for Miranda’s phone as she extends it away from him. *

Miranda – No! What is wrong with you!

Shawn – Let me have your phone!

Miranda – What are you going to do? Search through all of my text messages like you’re in high school?!

Shawn – Well apparently that’s what you like, now give me your phone.

Miranda – No! You’re acting like a little child!

Shawn – Well by not giving me your phone you’ve clearly got something to hide so maybe I should just dump you right now out of circumstantial evidence of cheating.

Miranda – Babe no! Fine, here’s my phone! I promise I’m not hiding anything.

* Shawn takes the phone as Miranda lays on top of Shawn cuddling with his chest. Shawn searches through her contacts and deletes a person named “Ryan”. Shawn then tosses the phone to the ground. *

Shawn – There, now he’s out of your phone for good.

Miranda – Well he could always call me…

Shawn – Well then it looks like I have an assignment for one of my pledges then don’t I?

Miranda – Also, I hate to tell you, but the “Ryan” in my phone is actually my cousin. The “Ryan” you were looking for in my phone was under “Choopie”.

* Miranda starts laughing as she hops off of Shawn grabbing her phone while Shawn tries to grab it but clearly doesn’t have the energy to chase after her because of the all day drink and drug fest he’s been having. He just grabs any small item he can find around him, seemingly pebbles or beer bottle caps and throws them at her. *

Shawn – Miranda! Get back here! You better come back here before I get really angry! And what the fuck is a “choopie”!?

* Shawn then rolls over realizing that he’s getting absolutely no response. He then looks up into the sky. *

Shawn – (sigh) Damn that woman really knows how to push a guys buttons…

* Miranda then pops her head out from the sliding glass door. *

Miranda – Babe! Also, I was wondering if you could hire Ryan at your restaurant “Seasons” to be like a bartender or a waiter or something? He’s looking really hard for a job but he can’t seem to find one anywhere! I told him I could get you to help him out.

Shawn – Are you kidding me?! First you help your ex-boyfriend move in to his new apartment, something a tiny little girl like you could hardly help with and now you want me to hire this little shit to work in MY restaurant?!

Miranda – Come on Shawn! He’d work really hard!

Shawn – What part of you thinks that I care?! What’s an 18 year old kid going to do in my restaurant?! Is he even of legal age to serve alcohol?

Miranda – Yeah…Shawn…he was a waiter in high school, he would fit right in. Didn’t I hear you say the other day how you had to fire somebody for treating Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie like crap when they came in to eat?

Shawn – And you think that Ryan would be fine with all these celebrities walking around and having to actually talk to them?

Miranda – He was fine with the biggest celebrity of them all when he met you remember?

Fuck! She really knows how to butter me up. She knows that I can’t deny my own celebrity status. I think she knows how to play this game to well, time for me to throw her a curveball.

Shawn – I’ll hire him only if you allow me to hire another assistant!

I know she’s not going to let me do that, not after Halia.

Miranda – Ok sweetie! Thank you so much! I’m going to call Ryan now and tell him to stop by sometime for an orientation!

* Miranda pulls out her phone and retreats inside. Shawn looks distraught. *


She’s good….possibly too good!

* Shawn goes back to his relaxation. *

* Shawn Winters smirks. *

Shawn – Sometimes I wonder who the brain is behind your little operation. Team Extraordinary, you’ve got James Exeter, his brother Hurse, and then a chip and dales reject from the Patrick Swayze dirty dancing collection in a body guard Rick Rohl. I think they are under the interpretation that if they put all three of their pebble sized brains together they could resemble that of a 10 year old child which would be much more respected then what they are working with solo.

It’s crazy, Hurse used to be someone who I supposed was respected by the SCW roster. Hell, the guy defeated me in my 2nd pay per view match back to the active roster. I don’t know how he did it but he pulled one out, much more then I can say for his “better” brother James Exeter. If I remember right wasn’t it the two of them who squared off against each other last year around this time with Hurse coming out on top? Explain to me how James is the “Extraordinary One” again? I mean anyone calling himself as such and being defeated by an 18 year old girl with mommy issues then you’ve really got to be missing a few links.

Now I know that I’m missing some brain cells with all the things I’ve put in my body but not even I fathom losing a match to a 18 year old drama queen! The fact that he lost a match to the lesser Steward is also an alarming issue. Again, how was he able to win Taking Hold of the Flame and get a chance at my Championship at Rise to Greatness? But, I digress.

James you have been out of action for quite awhile before your recent return, so just in case you’ve forgotten let me remind you of your history…you’ve got one of being second best! Two straight years you came in second place at Taking Hold of the Flame! You were second fiddle to Matt Hodges in your little gay parade for a friendship! You were even second best when you lost to me right before you took an absence!

So even though you may think that you’re on top of the world right now after winning Taking Hold of the Flame on a miraculous third attempt but the bitter truth remains that until you defeat me, you’ll always be SECOND BEST! (smirks) And coming from a guy that takes three tries to accomplish something it looks like you’ve better hope to weasel in a singles match with me before Rise 2 Greatness otherwise you’re going to be nothing more then another successful title defense for the One Man Scandal. I’d like to give you this tag team match as a second attempt but what fun would that be if either Katie or Hurse get the win or the loss? (smirks) So James, you’ve better come up with some amazing KICKASS plan because nobody remembers who comes in second! The fact is what you’ve accomplished, it really holds no merit what so ever until you win the SCW Championship at Rise to Greatness! So you can go ahead and boast and brag about a meaningless accomplishment all you want because when it comes right down to it, you’ve done nothing until you take this belt right here from ME!

It’s funny, Taking Hold of the Flame is barely history and already the talk of James Exeter being able to take the SCW Championship away from me has faded. The hopes and dreams of all the little children who look at James Exeter as an older broth-…well maybe in James’ case a younger brother. They look at James and see their dreams and their wishes and hope that he can reach what they were never able to. Whether, all those wishes, those hopes, those dreams have slowly faded when I left him motionless in the center of the ring in the blink of an eye. You see I just walked down that isle and took my sweet ass time and I picked my spot without James’ being the wiser. You see that’s all I have to do, outsmart James Exeter. That’s the luxury about being the SCW Champion, I don’t have to press to beat James Exeter, he has to press to beat me. Now in knowing this, it’s just common knowledge that he’s bound to press a little to much and make an ungodly mistake allowing me to do just what I did on Breakdown, pick my spot and leave him shattered on the mat along with all his fans hope and dreams.

James wants to prove exactly how “Extraordinary” he and his team really is, well it was quite easy for me and Katie Steward to prove how extraordinarily weak that they really are. You’ve got two grown men walking around acting like children with ADD chasing butterflies down a hallway only to stumble upon a winning lottery ticket, yeah James, that’s how I consider your little win at Taking Hold of the Flame, a stumble. A fluke, a complete and utter joke! The whole world was talking about you afterwards, “James Exeter finally wins at Taking Hold of the Flame!” “The third time is the charm!” Blah, blah, blah…where was my headlines? Where were the more justified headlines James? “Shawn Winters gives CHBK the final heartbreak!” “Shawn Winters STILL your Champion!” Where was my spotlight? It was no where, that’s where. People seem to have forgotten already the amazing five star match I put on with CHBK, with a seemingly rejuvenated CHBK. What everyone was talking about James, was you. A career failure who finally reached his potential. James, your like one of those 30 year old minor leaguers in baseball who has finally reached the show, only to fail. So I’m hoping your enjoying your little short lived meteoric rise because just like on Breakdown, I showed how quickly the air can be let out of the bag.

Breakdown the world will witness something that isn’t even worthy of being on basic cable. The team of Shawn Winters and Katie Steward, Drachewych is just spoiling his viewers by giving them the treat of seeing the two of us in the same ring as one another. Just for that, we should charge 100 dollars per ticket for admission, wait no scratch that…make it 500 dollars per ticket! Only the deserving should be allowed to witness the greatness that will be in the ring on Breakdown, and no I’m certainly not talking about James and his half tard brother Hurse…I’m talking about the One Man Scandal and the Goddess of Desire…so fare warning to those at home, adjust your television sets accordingly because I wouldn’t want any of you to be blinded before Rise to Greatness! (smirks)

* The scene fades out on Shawn’s cocky smirk. *