Friday, May 8th, 2009
Out of Control will go down in history…when people tell stories of legends, of icons, of dynasties…the stories will begin and end with Greaternity. Some say that they lived with legends and some say that they lived in the time of giants. Anyone alive today can officially say that they lived with GODS! Greaternity did something that nobody in the industry could ever think possible. We defeated 8 of the top SCW and hell even one of IWC’s top stars to reign supreme in Tactical Warfare. The cards were even stacked against us with the Infection getting the final 4 entries to the match but yet what did they do that has been so befitting of them? They paid tribute to the Greaternity the same way the University of Oregon Sororities did…by lying on there back! It’s been a broken record for the past couple of months with Infection and Greaternity. People want to call it a rivalry? What rivalry? It’s been a straight raping! This song and dance has been on repeat ever since I defeated Jason Wheeler for the SCW Championship!
So the question really is, what’s left for Greaternity? What’s next for us really to do? I mean in one single match we defeated anyone and everyone that possibly in any sort of way posed as a challenge to us. We’re now the Kings of this company whether Mr. Drachewych likes it or not. We’ve embarrassed him enough times for him to go into permanent hiding. We’re getting our measurements so that we can have golden statues of us placed in front of SCW’s Headquarters. Whether we’re loved or hated we’re the main attraction to any SCW televised event. Just because we don’t care about anyone doesn’t mean that everyone doesn’t care about us.
The look on each and every loser’s face at Out of Control could prevent the sun from ever coming back up. They all treated it like it was the end of there respected lives. Greg Cherry? Can fade into obscurity. CHBK? You want to still go? Then stay away from Greaternity. David Miller? You got me once but when it really mattered it was Greaternity that mattered. Asher Hayes? Well I suppose I might not be finished with you yet. Then the entire Infection…they might as well just walk away because everything that they’ve been put together to do they have failed miserably at.
So the question really is…what’s next for Greaternity? Well sadly for me, it’s more of the same. Once again Shawn Winters will be facing the Infection. I mean it’s not like I haven’t been wrestling these two brothers for the past 3 months. Greaternity proves to be the best of the best? So the most logical choice for Oleksa to do is have us prove it right? Wow…you’ve only got to really prove something once Olek…the sad thing is we’ve proved it against you non stop for 3 months now.
So what is it that I suggest? I suggest we change things up a bit.
* The scene is set up with a huge jumbo screen behind a podium with an SCW logo flashing around on the screen. You see a giant stadium filled with fans wearing there favorite SCW merchandise which oddly resemble card board cut outs. A stadium covered with tables and agents with phones making calls. Then in the middle of it all you see a giant desk with a flat screen television in front of it showing the same SCW logo as the jumbo screen behind it except below this logo it says “Draft”. You then see four men sitting behind the desk and they are as follows: Chris Berman who oddly resembles Adam Allocco, Steve Young who oddly resembles Alex Desoubrais Jr., Keyshawn Johnson who…oddly enough looks like a cardboard cut out, and then finally Mel Kiper Jr. who resembles Shawn Winters. The stage set up strongly resembles that of the NFL draft. *
Berman (Adam) – The rumors have swirled and the talk has been heard. After Out of Control’s Tactical Terror match up it seems as though SCW has decided to try and shift the power in the company. After Greaternity just seemingly whipped the floor with the other teams it’s safe to say that maybe a change would be a great idea. So to join me for this electric ride I have to my right the legend himself Steve Young, the electric Keyshawn Johnson, and then the one and only Mel Kiper Jr.!
Kiper (Shawn) – That’s right Chris, today embarks the new era of Supreme Championship Wrestling and you’ve got to just wonder who is going to be drafted #1. Now I personally know exactly who it is because my giant head of hair here is only this big because it has to hide my brain. I Mel Kiper Jr. have never once in the history of history ever predicted something wrong and if you disagree with anything I say then you’re clearly an idiot.
* Right then Todd McShay who oddly resembles Ace Marshall pops up on the screen. *
Todd (Ace) – Excuse me Mel, but last time I checked I was the expert on this panel.
Berman (Adam) – And out on the floor is our very own Todd McShay!
Kiper (Shawn) – Right Todd, which is exactly why I’m allowed to sit at the big boys table when you’re having to hire your own camera crew just to get your voice heard on this broadcast!
Todd (Ace) – Well I to be honest I would be up there but the sight of Chris Berman chocking on your two inch cock is beyond my threshold of torture.
Kiper (Shawn) – Well Todd if you ever got anything right in your life maybe we could arrange for Steve here to choke on yours but since you are about as smart as an incest baby I’m willing to predict right here and now that it’ll never happen! Mark another right prediction down for Mel Kiper Jr.!
Berman (Adam) – Oh excuse me!
* Chris Berman then climbs under the table. *
Kiper (Shawn) – Yeah….that’s right…whose Mel Kiper Jr.? I am…..yeah…..
* Chris Berman then brings himself back up to the desk, right then Oleksa Drachewych who oddly enough resembles a homeless man. *
Oleksa (Hobo) – Welcome everyone to the SCW Talent Draft, we are about to witness a new beginning here in SCW. Superstars will be drafted to certain teams here in SCW and with the impact and outcome that Tactical Warfare seemed to have on the industry Team Infection will be granted the very first draft choice here this evening. So, Team Infection will be on the clock.
* Camera is now back on the main table. *
Berman (Adam) – Since Team Infection took the pin fall at Out of Control it seems as though they are designated as the weakest team so they’ll be in position to make the very first draft choice.
Kiper (Shawn) – That’s true and it’s deservingly so as the Infection has been losing every which way possible lately. They’re clearly the weakest team in SCW. Now it’s up to them right now to determine who would benefit the cause the most.
Berman (Adam) – In case I need remind anyone EVERYONE is on the board tonight. It’s a restart here in SCW and each superstar is eligible to be drafted to any team. So in saying that who do you see being the overall number 1 draft choice by team Infection Mel?
Kiper (Shawn) – I mean come on Chris really?! I mean the number one choice has GOT to be without a shadow of a doubt the One Man Scandal and current SCW World Heavyweight Champion Shawn Winters! The guy pinned Jason Wheeler at Out of Control! He’s the reigning World Champion! He’s currently part of the greatest team SCW has ever seen in Greaternity! He’s easily the number one choice!
* Right then Todd McShay appears split screen with Mel Kiper. *
Todd (Ace) – Wow Mel, you’re clearly getting up there in age! Shawn Winters need I remind you is in terrible condition! He’s got a horrible back right now so I’m going to throw out who the ACTUAL number one draft choice will be and it’s going to be the former SCW Champion and current number one contender Christian Savior! I mean it wasn’t his fault that the Infection lost in Tactical Warfare it was his idiotic brother Jason’s fault. The guy is in great health and he’s about to regain his SCW Championship on Breakdown when he takes on Shawn Winters! If the Infection was smart they’d go with health and future instead of Mr. Right Now, which is Shawn Winters!
Kiper (Shawn) – Lay off the peace pipe McShay…Shawn Winters is clearly the pick. Just look at his body of work! His resume is by far superior to Christian Savior’s! I mean it was Christian Savior who was to afraid to wrestle Shawn for the Championship a couple of months ago! Then it was Shawn Winters who defeated Savior to get the SCW Championship back! If it comes down to anything, Shawn Winters is a proven winner and that’s what you need more then anything with the number one overall draft pick! Shawn may have a bad back but even so he’s still better then anyone in the industry and the SCW Championship proves that!
Todd (Ace) – He’s a winner?! Come on Mel, we all saw him at Out of Control! He was a little weasel running away from any altercation that he could! I mean you saw him run like a little girl when Asher Hayes was eye to eye with him! You saw him kick Adam Allocco and Ace Marshall who were both knocked out trying to get them to save him! You saw him run away from David Miller! The guy is a complete weasel and a coward! Sure maybe he wins but he sure as hell doesn’t have any integrity!
Kiper (Shawn) – Weasel? Christian Savior manipulated his way out of a one on one match with Shawn Winters to gain the SCW Championship! You want to talk about cowards?! Christian Savior is clearly the biggest coward the world of professional wrestling has ever seen! He’s a coward and he’s a loser! He lost the Championship to Shawn Winters after 2 weeks! Shawn Winters is without a doubt the greatest in the business “weasel” or not! The One Man Scandal will once again reign supreme here tonight in this draft!
Todd (Ace) – Mel, you said it yourself just now, he’s the “One Man Scandal” that’s his moniker. I mean is he really what you want as the face of your team? The guy does not have the personality or mental presence of an SCW superstar! The entire world has heard about his reputation! It’s only a matter of time before the guy is in rehab or AA!
Steve (Alex) – Or gets arrested for statutory rape, I mean his girlfriends just keep getting younger and younger.
Berman (Adam) – Over or under three months until Shawn Winters’ next girlfriend is Miley Cyrus?!
Kiper (Shawn) – I’ll admit in drafting Shawn Winters you’ll be drafting all the excessive baggage in which he carries but even so Shawn Winters is so an elite commodity that you’d have to be on crack in order not to draft him!
Todd (Ace) – Which is possible since I heard Shawn Winters was seen selling crack after Out of Control!
Kiper (Shawn) – See now you’re just making shit up Todd!
* Right then Oleksa makes his way back out to the podium. *
Berman (Adam) – Here we go!
Oleksa (Hobo) – Ladies and gentleman, there has been a trade!
Berman (Adam) – Oh my god! There has been a trade! There has been a trade! How long do I have to keep yelling before everyone likes me?! There has been a trade!
Oleksa (Hobo) – Team Infection has traded the number one overall draft pick to Team Greaternity!
* The virtual crowd cheers. *
Kiper (Shawn) – I knew it! Greaternity is going to draft Shawn Winters!
Oleksa (Hobo) – With the first choice in the 2009 SCW Superstar Draft…Team Greaternity picks….Shawn Winters, SCW World Heavyweight Champion!
* The virtual crowd cheers once more. *
Kiper (Shawn) – YES! Screw you McShay!
Berman (Adam) – Mel Kiper Jr. does it again! As he said, Shawn Winters the SCW World Champion has been drafted number one overall! Mel, how excited are you right now?!
Kiper (Shawn) – I have an erection!
Berman (Adam) – Oh, I think that’s my cue!
* Chris Berman disappears under the table once again. *
Steve (Alex) – While Chris is preoccupied let’s take a look at the trade that just happened! It looks like Greaternity received Shawn Winters from the Infection in exchange for some Valtrex which is a very effective medication for….herpes infections…
Oleksa (Hobo) – Team SCW is now on the clock!
* Chris Berman then reappears again from under the desk. *
Berman (Adam) – Well we witnessed a shock with Greaternity making a trade for the number one pick, now we have Team SCW on the clock! Where do you think they’re going to look Mel?
Kiper (Shawn) – Well I’m sure Todd is going to disagree with me here because that’s the only reason he has a job right now, to be wrong…but the next pick has to be none other then Adam Allocco!
Todd (Ace) – What!? What are you on Mel?! Christian Savior is still on the board here! He’s the number one contender and you want to pick a guy whose trying to get the Tag Team Championships?!
Kiper (Shawn) – Oh you’re just so damn predictable Todd! Adam Allocco is going to be the next draft choice because he is or will be was part of the greatest team in SCW history! Making him better then Christian Savior! I personally would wait a few rounds before I start drafting failures Todd.
Todd (Ace) – Failures?! Christian Savior is NOT a failure! He’s clearly the 2nd best superstar in SCW right now!
Kiper (Shawn) – According to who?! You?!
Todd (Ace) – According to his number one contender status!
Kiper (Shawn) – He only got that status out of further failure from his brother Jason! Last time I checked winning was the most important thing and Christian Savior has a less then stellar winning percentage in SCW. In fact he has a losing percentage so to draft him number 2 would be absurd! Adam Allocco even without a title reign has proven himself far more then this Christian Savior jackass!
Todd (Ace) – So what you’re trying to tell me is that Christian Savior’s title reign was nothing more then a fluke?! That he only got a chance because he brother sucked even worse then he did?! Is that what you’re telling me?!
Kiper (Shawn) – If you’d clean out your ears Todd you’d realize that’s exactly what I’m telling you. This draft is to draft people that will make a difference! Not to draft somebody that’s going to ride somebody’s coat tails to failure!
* Right then Oleksa makes his way back out to the podium. *
Berman (Adam) – Here we go again!
Oleksa (Hobo) – Ladies and gentleman, there has been a trade!
Berman (Adam) – What?! Another trade?! This has never happened before EVER!!!
Oleksa (Hobo) – Team SCW has officially traded the number two overall draft choice to Team Greaternity…
* The virtual crowd cheers. *
Kiper (Shawn) – This is it!
Todd (Ace) – What?! No!!!
Oleksa (Hobo) – With the second pick in the SCW Superstar Draft…Greaternity selects… “Wrestlings Enlightment” Adam Allocco!
* The virtual crowd cheers. *
Oleksa – Bad Company is now on the clock.
Steve (Alex) – Bad Company is on the clock?
Kiper (Shawn) – Yes Steve, every team in SCW has the chance to draft and better there team here in the SCW Superstar Draft! So far Greaternity is making a steal here! Getting the top two superstars on the board!
Todd (Ace) – Top two superstars my ass! Christian Savior is…
* All the sudden Todd McShay’s microphone begins to cut out. *
Berman (Adam) – Well it looks like we’re having some technical difficulties here with Todd’s mic.
Kiper (Shawn) – I think he coughed up some of Christian Savior’s seamen onto the mic.
Berman (Adam) – Well let’s take a look at the trade. Greaternity receives Adam Allocco the number two overall draft choice and send a Magic Bullet to SCW…
Kiper (Shawn) – Which I hear is GREAT for cutting Cherry’s!
Steve (Alex) – That’s ironic since SCW just released Greg Cherry and Ashley Cherry.
Kiper (Shawn) – Steve…..god damn it.
Berman (Adam) – Well with the third overall draft choice Bad Company gets the pick.
Kiper (Shawn) – And without Todd McShay to corrupt everyone’s minds with his complete nonsense about Christian Savior we now have what you could call “relevant” television!
Berman (Adam) – So I guess you could call Todd McShay “Mr. Irrelevant” right?
Kiper (Shawn) – Wow Chris Berman you are so clever….
Berman (Adam) – So with Bad Company now on the clock and Todd McShay not here to say that the next pick should be Christian Savior, Mel Kiper Jr. and all of your wisdom please tell the world who the next pick is going to be! Please Mel…do us all a favor and let us into that brain of yours!
Kiper (Shawn) – Well if it means that much to you Chris I’ll give you a little bit of insight…the next pick in the SCW draft is going to be…
Todd (Ace) – Christian Savior!
* Todd McShay just ran into the table. *
Kiper (Shawn) – What the hell?! Who let this asshole up here?!
Todd (Ace) – The next draft pick is Christian Savior just admit it!
Kiper (Shawn) – Actually it’s going to be Ace Marshall!
* Todd goes silent. *
Todd (Ace) – Ok, I can except that…he’s sexy.
* Right then Kiper shoves Todd off the stage set up to the floor. Oleksa then makes his way to the podium. *
Oleksa (Hobo) – There has been yet another trade! The third overall draft choice has been traded to Greaternity!
* The virtual crowd cheers. *
Berman (Adam) – Wow! Mel, Team Greaternity is just showing there greatness by overtaking this draft!
Kiper (Shawn) – Which is exactly why they won at Out of Control and exactly why Shawn Winters is going to retain his SCW Championship on Breakdown!
Berman (Adam) – And why Christian Savior has yet to be drafted.
Kiper (Shawn) – Like I’ve been trying to say all night. Now let’s listen to the pick.
Oleksa (Hobo) – With the third overall draft choice Greaternity selects…Ace Marshall!
* The virtual crowd cheers. *
Kiper (Shawn) – Ace Marshall the third overall draft choice! He showed a lot in the Tactical Warfare match and here he is rising the ranks of SCW! Team Greaternity is just manhandling this draft! Chris tell the world what Bad Company got in this trade.
Berman (Adam) – Bad Company has traded the third overall draft pick for a box of…syringes.
Kiper (Shawn) – I’m sure that they’ll be able to use them just fine.
Oleksa (Hobo) – Team Brat Pack is now on the clock.
Berman (Adam) – The Brat Pack is now on the clock…I mean I don’t expect to know what I’m talking about here but Alex Jr. has GOT to be the next draft choice right Mel? I mean each member of Greaternity has been chosen to re-represent Greatnerity in the new era of SCW….so Alex Jr. has got to be the next pick right? Taking a guess and saying that Greaternity will trade something off the wall to Team Brat Pack in order to get the fourth pick…am I anywhere near right here Mel?
Kiper (Shawn) – Nope absolutely wrong, I’d say that Greaternity makes the trade here but tries to upgrade Alex Jr.
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