Wednesday July 13th, 2011
Life comes at you so fast did you know that? It's like when good things happen they all seem to happen at once. Then when bad things happen they seem to come in sets as well. Well that's for normal people what happens with me? I get good news to only be followed by horrible news. My life the past couple months has been nothing short of a vomiting experience on a roller coaster. Now yes there has been vomiting but that's mostly been from the tequila that we've been drinking.
True Story of the Girl From Last Night
* The scene opens up showing the Greaternity bus driven by Ty on it's way to Tennessee. They are just entering Kentucky as Shawn, Ace, and Charlie are inside watching television. *
Ace Dude what was with you last night? I saw you rush to the bathroom and vomit your heart out.
Shawn You saw that huh?
Charlie Me and Ty even heard it from the front of the bus and me and him were pretty loud.
Shawn Damn woman can you leave it in your pants?
Charlie Not even for a second. (winks)
Ace What was it? I saw you go into your room with a top 10 hottie and you come out puking?
Shawn She had a rotten vag.
Ace What?! Haha.
I'm just blowing smoke at this point. I can't tell them to truth of what happened it's just down right cruel. I had way to much to drink and one thing leads to the next and I'm vomiting my guts out into a toilet that has become my new best friend.
Ace No way that chick had a rotten vag. She prolly even bleaches her butthole.
Shawn Trust me dude...her legs spread and it was David Helms head down their. Looked like it hadn't been washed in ages. I had to disinfect my entire bed.
Charlie That's fucking gross!
Rule number one when it comes to lying, make somebody else the bad guy.
Shawn Trust me I know. I kicked that bitch out and had her escorted off the premises.
Rule number two when it comes to lying, make sure that there isn't a trail for anyone to follow.
Ace Thank god, last thing I'd have needed was for her to come after me with that gas chamber.
Shawn Trust me, I did all of us a favor. We don't need to have this bus tainted with the likes of her. If you come onto this bus it means you're going to get laid, it's a proven fact but I wasn't going to default our rules by giving her more than she deserved and that's a public embarrassment.
Thank god they're believing all this.
Shawn With this bus we took a sacred oath that no vagina shall be left unpunished, no boob left unsqueezed, and no walk left unshamed. We took this oath and I will not tarnish it. However in fine print, if that vagina is not up to par then she shall be disbarred from our bus immediately without a discussion from our peers. We can't be tainting our bus by fucking girls that are less than 10's and that girls vagina made her a 5.
Ace Shawn...you did the right thing my friend. You dodged a bullet buddy.
* Right then Shawn's phone starts ringing. He looks at it a bit confused before looking up. *
Shawn It's my sister...
Ace OH! Tell her I said hi!
Shawn Eat shit!
* Shawn walks into his bedroom and classes the door/wall. *
Charlie So how much of Shawn's story did you believe?
Ace Less than one percent.
* Inside Shawn's room inside the bus he looks down at his phone seeing it's his sister to clarify in his mind. He hasn't talked to his sister since the intervention. He has kind of held each one of them responsible for his marriage being in shambles right now even though deep down he knows it's his own fault. He has always loved his sister and tried to protect her because she's the only family that he has left. He answers the phone. *
Brooke What's up ass face? What? You don't call and tell your little sister how things went with the old wifey? That seems a bit selfish don't you think?
Shawn Brooke, look who you're talking to.
Brooke Right, I forgot you're the landlord of the castle of selfishness. Haha.
Shawn So what's up?
Brooke Well...how are things with you and Hannah?
Shawn Are you seriously asking or are you just trying to pry?
Brooke I'm seriously asking. You are my brother Shawn and even though I'm just like you doesn't mean I don't love you.
Shawn Want me to be honest or do you want me to tell you want you want to hear?
Brooke Pick one...
Shawn I got served divorce papers last night.
Brooke Ok...now tell me the truth.
Shawn Fuck you!
Brooke Haha, I'm just kidding. Can't you smile a little bit?
Shawn Kind of hard to at the moment, you know...with my marriage ending.
Brooke Alright Debby Downer then go ahead and mope about it. Have you signed the papers yet?
Shawn No...I don't know if I can. If I sign them it means I've given up.
Brooke And if you don't?
Shawn She'll have to see me eventually.
Brooke Well I'm not going to lie Shawn this isn't really a fool proof plan but it's probably the only one you've got.
Shawn Thanks Brooke...so hows home? Hows the family?
Brooke Oh you know, same old same old. Mom and Dad are pretending like you never existed and I'm pretty sure Mark is gay now.
Brooke Yup...I haven't seen him with a girl since you ruined his wedding and his fiancee killed herself. Kind of ruins a love life don't you think? Haha.
I'm going to be a great father....
Brooke But Shawn the thing is I did actually call for a reason. I was actually hoping that you'd be in a better mood when I asked you this but well...I need a favor.
Shawn What is it?
Brooke Well, as you know I'm going to college this coming semester.
Shawn What? College? How old are you?
Brooke Haha....I'm 18 Shawn.
Shawn No...last time I checked you were 14.
I knew she was 18 but the fact is I'll always see her as my little sister. The thought of her going to college just makes me think of my life in college and my life in Greaternity acting like I'm in college. She's going to end up pregnant and I'm going to end up in jail for murdering somebody.
Brooke Shawn stop, you know I'm 18. As much as you wish to ignore it, I have boobs and a vagina now.
Shawn STOP IT!
Brooke Haha! Shawn come on! I'm trying to talk to you.
Shawn Well then please refrain from mentioning certain things to your big brother.
Brooke Alright, alright. Well, as I said I'll be going to college this coming semester and I ran into a snag with mom and dad.
Shawn What kind of snag?
Brooke Well...they won't pay for my college.
Shawn You're joking right? Why the fuck not?
Brooke Because I'm going to UCLA...
Shawn Excuse me?!
Brooke I'm moving to LA Shawn.
Brooke I got accepted to UCLA but mom and dad won't pay for it because they don't want me anywhere near you.
Yeah...wish I could say that I'm shocked by their response.
Shawn Brooke why do you want to come to LA? And don't you dare say that you want to be an actress.
Brooke I...I want to get away from all of this Shawn. You have no idea how hard it's been living here in this house. There has been constant tension ever since...you know. I want to leave and go far away and I thought of all people you could understand that. I want to go somewhere where I have family and that family is you Shawn. Is it such a bad idea for me to come to LA?
Shawn So...let me get this straight...you want me to pay for your college tuition?
Brooke NO! I wouldn't ask that from you. I've already been approved for a loan but, the price of living in LA is insane for a college girl with no job.
Shawn Well then what are you asking me?
Brooke Well...would it be a problem if I lived with you? I mean you have this giant house and I'm sorry to mention it it's only you living their at the moment.
Shawn Brooke, I'm rarely ever home. You know how hectic my schedule gets. After Rise to Greatness it's only going to get worse. I'm home maybe 1 day a week and with this bus maybe not even that.
Brooke Why can't I live there?
Shawn Whose going to take care of you?
Brooke Shawn, I'm 18 I don't need anyone to take care of me. I can take care of myself. (getting upset) All I'm asking you is for a place to stay. Heaven forbid you actually do something for somebody else and heaven forbid your little sister actually wanting to see her older brother! I guess that it's just too much to ask.
Shawn Brooke....(sigh) you're right. Brooke I'm sorry...of course you can live in my house. It'll be nice to actually have somebody to come home to.
Brooke (cheerful) THANKS!
Shawn You totally played me just now didn't you?
Brooke Want me to be honest or do you want me to tell you want you want to hear?
Shawn You are such an asshole.
Brooke And so are you. See, this is going to be great. Now...one more question.
Shawn Oh god...what now?
Brooke When I get there...can you hook me up with a part time job as a waitress at your restaurant?
Thank god she wants to work at Seasons and not my strip club.
Shawn I think I can manage that Brooke. When do you plan on moving?
Brooke In a couple weeks at the latest.
Shawn Alright...I'll make sure that I'm around when you do.
Brooke Thanks Shawn, you're the best. I love you.
Shawn Love you too...now go put in your retainer and make some sort of cute macaroni art or something. Haha.
* Shawn hangs up the phone and actually has a smile on his face before it soon fades. *
It's going to be nice actually having someone around at home I'm not going to lie. But deep down every time I see Brooke it's just going to remind me of how Hannah isn't there.
* The party is on for Greaternity as they are celebrating outside of their bus beside a bar. Girls are running wild and Shawn Winters is surrounded by women all trying to get a piece of him. He's relaxed as they're all trying to get at him. He's not acting like he's interested in any of them because secretly he's not. One girl comes over that catches his attention. She gets right in front of him before dancing and throwing her ass right in front of Shawn's face. Shawn bites his lip as he leans back. The girl gets right up on him and begins to grind her ass right into Shawn's crotch before turning around and straddling him. She then gets up starting to walk away before motioning with her finger for him to follow which he does. She leads him onto the bus and towards his bedroom. The grind fest continues as her hips go back and forth before stops and pulls out a piece of paper out of her bra. *
Random Girl You've just been served.
* Shawn is in disbelief. He doesn't know what just happened as the girl stands there with a smile. He looks at the paper and see's that he's just been served divorce paper. He's been divorced 2 times before but it was always him that filed the papers. He then throws himself into the bathroom puking his guts out as the girl leaves the bus. *
* The camera shows Shawn Winters in front of an SCW logo with a giant picture of Shilo Valiant beside him holding both the United States and World Heavyweight Championships. *
Shawn Haha, Masq...wow here we are. It took alot longer than I thought it would I'm not going to lie. Mark up another point for the brilliance of Sasha's booking skills. Haha. Shilo's best friend...his best buddy...his bro...his amego...his bff...about to step into the ring one on one against Shilo's challenger at Rise to Greatness. It's got to make you a bit jealous doesn't it? Seeing your best friend in the spot light. A spot light that you feel like you deserve. Come on, don't tell me that you think Shilo deserves it more than you? You can't be that weak minded. You've accomplished alot already in this business. And now it's all been overshadowed by your best friend Shilo Valiant. Everything you've done just kind of disappears by the waist side doesn't it? Those accomplishments you have aren't really viewed so highly now are they? The moment the world saw who the better person was in your tag team you became obsolete. Now sure, you've got a chance at Rise to Greatness to make a mark for yourself but really? Do you give yourself that good of a shot? It's a shame my friend, all your life, for the rest of your life you will be in Shilo's shadow until you decide to do something about it. Now I'm not trying to stir the pot to try and cause any tension between you and my opponent for Rise to Greatness I'm just telling you what your subconsious has been telling you ever since Shilo won the World Championship and defeated you in the center of the ring. Deep down inside your soul you know you are just biting at the teeth waiting for another chance to show that you're the better wrestler, that you're no obsolete. But you see, after Rise to Greatness when I become World Champion when do you think that chance is going to come? I've got to tell you you're not going to be very high on the contender board so a you'll need to make an impact. Let's go ahead and throw out the Scaffold Match because we both know that you're not going to win that. You see I have each important match at Rise to Greatness sown up shut. I brought Adam Allocco back to take care of Jake Starr, get him out of my hair. I've got Ace Marshall in that Scaffold Match to ensure that none of you undeserving pieces of shit get a shot at my World Championship. Then I've got myself in the main event against Shilo...the title is as good as mine so what I'm telling you Masq is this...take out Shilo Valiant, make my job at Rise to Greatness a little easier and who knows what kind of treasures will be bestowed upon you. You've got the chance, Shilo will never see it coming and it will be a beautiful thing. The masses around the world watching will thank you for it I promise you. You'll finally be standing up for what you believe in and you will no longer be Shilo's sidekick.
Oh, wait...did I go to far? You're not Shilo's sidekick are you? No, not at all. You're his equal. You're his friend. You two are as inseperable as conjoined twins. (smirks) But the thing is even conjoined twins want to live their own lives without the other. Shilo's moving on without Masq and it's only a matter of time before you're entirely forgotten and placed in dark matches on Breakdowns and Ammo's and eventually getting a notice of your release in the mail from Sasha because you won't even be worth firing face to face. The clock is ticking on the rest of your career Masq and I could quite honestly help you save it. You have pride...or has Shilo taken that away from you too? Has he taken away your pride? Your dignity? Your manhood? Hell, maybe I'm wrong about you Masq. Maybe you really are contempt with being a lacky now. No pressure put on you to succeed. Maybe Shilo truly has robbed you of everything that even made you a man. He's taken your soul and he's taken your heart. You've become a zombie following him because he is in control of your life. Take it back Masq, take back what is rightfully yours. He can't control you forever. Just imagine a world where Shilo Valiant is no longer Champion. Do you think you'll get a bit of your dignity back then? He'll no longer have that to hold over you am I right? You two can once again be equals. Best friends forever and live on in this bro-mance that you two have created for each other. But it'll all be for not Masq because deep down you'll always see that "former World Heavyweight Champion" next to his name and what will your name have? Nothing worth wasting breath on. You resent Shilo Valiant for his accomplishments, you hate him, you loth him for beating you...now is the time to actually man up and do something about it. Show that you have control, show that you have a set of balls and that they're not locked up in some sort of Necro-Box in Shilo's closet. But hey...just like your subconsious, I'm not telling you anything that you don't already know. (smirks)
* Shawn smiles into the camera before it fades out on an SCW logo. *